My grandma is having a spare washer and dryer that she has delivered to me tomorrow morning.
I’ve never been so excited to do laundry in my entire life!
If you have a bunch of dirty laundry, bring it on over. I draw the line, however, at poo stained undies. You can wash those yourself.
See that little orange/red/yellow marble looking thingy beside each blog post title?
I made that in Fireworks! All by my lonesome!! I’m proud of myself cause I can barely turn the TV on most days.
UPDATE: You know what I just noticed? That little orange/red/yellow marble looking thingy doesn’t show up in individual post pages. It only shows up at the main blog page. Bummer.
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Last night I was in so much pain that I probably should have gone to the emergency room. I took two Tylenol #2’s but they didn’t work at all. After a few hours it was tolerable enough that I could sorta go to sleep, but I’m still feeling it pretty bad today.
Anyway, the whole point of this - It was so bad that my boyfriend asked if I should go to the hospital. I was thinking yes, but I said no because we were watching a movie and I really wanted to see the end of it. How lame is that?
There were a few points where I got so dizzy from the pain that I almost passed out, but I didn’t say anything cause I really wanted to see that stupid show. I think there’s something wrong with me. Psychologically I mean.
The physically wrong with me part is still a mystery (my doc things it might be endometriosis), but I’m seeing a specialist in July so hopefully I won’t be annoying people with my whining for too much longer. The good side of all of this is I’m nauseous all the time and I can’t eat as much so I’ve lost a few pounds 
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I discovered this site (http://www.toptut.com/) yesterday when I was searching for a new Wordpress theme for this blog.
I love her style of writing and I LOVE her designs. They’re beautiful and quirky and really unique (kinda like how I wish I was) so if you’re looking for a theme for your wordpress blog, definitely check it out!
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My grandma is giving me a spare washer and dryer set that she just happens to have laying around.
My washing machine has been out of commission for quite awhile now and my dryer is a piece of shit that chooses to only work when it feels like it. I’ve been driving my dirty laundry over to my mom’s house but that’s a pain in the ass because her house is not ideal for my chaotic son to run around in, and I just play games the entire time while I’m there instead of working.
So if I can have a working washer and dryer in my own house again, it only stands to reason that I’ll get more work done right? I’ll save gas too so I’m doing the environment a favour cause I’m so nice.
Just in case I have nothing better to do, I like to find pointless sites and waste a lot of time on them. Here’s one I found this morning.
http://www.nbc.com/The_Office/photos/your_office/
I was reading Creed’s blog then ventured over to ‘Your Office’ where people can post pictures of their own office. I’m assuming most of the pictures are supposed to be funny, but the real humour is in the comments. At least for me it is because I can be extremely immature and find that kind of stuff immensely amusing.
So if you’re an 8-year old trapped in a 25-year old body like me, check it out…but only if you’re at work and you like to waste company time. Keep an eye out for Stephanie’s comments.
Today I didn’t realize how ridiculous I was until after the fact, but now that I do….I’m slightly ashamed of myself.
At supper tonight, I had a serious craving for some Sprite. I don’t like giving my 3 year old daughter pop too much, especially at supper, so I devised a plan that I could still have some but give her water instead. It works out well that Sprite is clear.
I got up from the table and snuck to the fridge. I pulled out the bottle as fast as I could and slipped into the bathroom which is right off the kitchen next to the fridge. I poured myself a glass of pop while standing over the bathroom sink, then quickly went back out and snuck the Sprite back into the fridge.
Then I went over to the kitchen sink and turned on the tap. I pretended to fill my glass with water and then asked my daughter if she wanted any water too. Of course she said yes, so I got her a glass too. When I sat down with our drinks, she looked at mine for awhile. She could see the bubbles in my Sprite, then she looked at her flat water. I figured I was busted, but she never said anything. That may have been my last chance to trick her like that. She’s getting too smart for mommy’s deceptiveness.
At least I’m not alone though. I remember reading an article in the Saskatoon Star Phoenix one time by Cam Fuller I believe. He wrote how he would sneak some Coca Cola in a coffee mug and tell his kids it was coffee. That didn’t work for too long, and I’ve actually done the same thing with my own daughter, but she’s past that stage too.
Sometimes I’ll also sneak the pop out of the fridge and drink it right from the bottle after I’ve locked myself in the bathroom. How sad is that?? Or I’ll just stand right there while her back is turned and drink it from the bottle while standing with the fridge door open. Most times I’ll be trying to watch her out of the corner of my eye and I’ll end up spilling pop down my face. I’m real classy you know. (Note to anyone who comes over to my house, don’t drink the Sprite if you don’t want to get my germs.)
I’ve been super bored lately (even though I should be working) so I’ve been looking for some funny quotes online. I found a few good websites so I thought I’d compile a list here along with a few of my favorite quotes.
Note: Some of these quotes contain links to the pages where I found them. The same quotes are on a bunch of other websites, but I just linked to the first page I happened to find them on.
Found via http://www.coolfunnyquotes.com/
“You laugh because I’m different………..I laugh cause I just farted!”
“Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.”
“He who laughs last didn’t get it.”
“When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car.”
Found via http://www.goodquotes.com/funnythoughts.htm
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out?”
Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken over there … I’m gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt?”
A few movie quotes:
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!Dumb & Dumber
Lloyd: What’s the soup du jour?
Waiter: It’s the soup of the day.
Lloyd: Mmm… that does sound good.Shrek 2
Shrek: Someday I will repay you, unless of course I can’t find you or I forget.
Quotes from my friend ‘Sally’ - I’m changing her name cause she might beat me if I say her real name. (These were really funny at 1 a.m. but maybe not so much now… I thought I’d put them up anyway.)
“…meh, drunken sex happens.”
“Hmm, its like eating a whole cake.. I know I shouldn’t do it - but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to”
“Lemme look it up. I may have pretended I knew a word and didn’t.”
“I don’t think that lesbians should be allowed to used dildos.. they made their choice.”
On the subject of being mean to people “Call them a f***face also, it has more punch.”
“Even super models are self conscious… ‘if only i could have done a little more blow and threw up a bit more….’”
Last, but certainly not least, some good old Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey (who really is an actual person). You can visit the official site here and watch the Deep Thoughts like they used to show on Saturday Night Live, or you can visit here and read a bunch of them all on one page.
You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he’s really sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.
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Instead of a regular arm, Carl had been born with a pigeon’s wing. The odd thing was, all through his life, no one ever laughed at his wing — not even the mean kids at school. Then one day he realized why: He looked in the mirror and saw that he was a pigeon! He shit right there, as he often did, wherever he was.
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If I was being executed by injection, I’d clean up my cell real neat. Then when they came to get me, I’d say, “Injection? I thought you said ‘inspection.’” They’d probably feel real bad, and maybe I could get out of it.
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Many people don’t realize that playing dead can help not only with bears, but also at important business meetings.
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Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Mankind. Basically, it’s made up of two separate words — “mank” and “ind.” What do these words mean? It’s a mystery, and that’s why so is mankind.
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We used to laugh at Grandpa when he’d head off to go fishing. But we wouldn’t be laughing that evening, when he’d come back with some whore he picked up in town.
Oh how I wish I were American so I could vote for anyone BUT Sanjaya on American Idol! If he wins the show, I’ll have to stick a needle in my eye.
OK people! If you watched the Oprah Oscar Special, then you’d know that George Clooney was clearly joking when he ‘admitted’ to Julia Roberts about having his ‘eyes done’.
She asked him if he’s ever had any plastic surgery, and he said he had his eyes done and proceeded to ask her if he looked ‘awake’. If you’ve ever seen George Clooney in anything other than his movies or television appearances, you’d know that he has a really cool sense of humor and he’s always joking around.
This was another case of him joking around. He did not, I repeat DID NOT, have plastic surgery.
So all these gossip and plastic surgery blogs can stop posting before and after pictures that look the same. And stop taking everything so literally. Celebrities are allowed to joke around once in awhile.
I love Dana Carvey. He can do no wrong in my eyes. Chopping Broccoli is definitely one of my favorite things he’s ever done, next to the turtle in Master of Disguise.
